Wednesday, August 18, 2010

How to be a better woman and not tolerate any crap from men?

How do I ensure a man wont cheat on me? Do I have to treat a man like crap to earn his respect? WHy do some guys like to flirt with other women when they are married or committed in a relationship? I dont understandHow to be a better woman and not tolerate any crap from men?
For starters read the book:





';What Men Don't Want Women To Know: The Secrets, The Lies, The Unspoken Truth'; By Smith %26amp; Doe





Ok this is no clinical, cold study of male behavior. This is a very humorous clue to how men tick. Some of it's crass %26amp; base...but we ARE talking about men here. I read it %26amp; laughed my @ss off....but also gained insight on a few things and validated some suspicions about other things.





Another interesting book by a man but FOR men is called ';The Game';. It's sort of a dude's 'how to' book for scoring with chicks...it's just interesting...that's all.





Some men flirt. Some do it to validate themselves - to make them feel like they still ';got it';. Some women do the same thing. If you two are together and he's doing it, but leaves with YOU...





Remember that the old instinct for a man is to spread his seed far %26amp; wide. That's what early man did...they banged as many women as they could....thereby insuring the continuation of their DNA. The conventions of religion are what keep some men in a one man one woman dynamic. But there are guys that truly want the one/one dynamic too...not all are wanting to run around.





Guys need strokes....I'm not being dirty here. It doesn't matter if you clean the bathroom every time and he says nothing. But if he does it, he REALLY NEEDS to hear you make a fuss over the fact that HE did it. Sort of the hero thing, you know? ';Oh honey...you vacuumed the living room? Sweetie thank you so much...that's so nice of you...and you did such a nice job....'; Their inner boy scouts need the strokes...truly. Their egos depend on it.





By all means be assertive - just don't try to ';beat him down';. Respect has to be mutual. Don't treat your man any worse than YOU want to be treated. The golden rule really is a valid one. And you'll respect yourself more if you treat him well.





As far as the cheating goes:





Make sure he gets plenty of sex. Make sure you initiate it some of the time. And flirting doesn't count as initiating sex. Go up to him and grope his crotch. Go up to him a lay a big kiss on his lips. Go up to him and flash him your twin girls and tell him to ';come %26amp; get 'em, big boy';...





But remember that no matter how well you treat your man...he may just be a player and a tool and not respect the relationship. Some are just not into one man one woman relationships. And for your own self respect and sanity leave that guy behind. He'd be a horrible role model if you two ended up having kids...





Good luck, I hope this VERY long answer helps.


How to be a better woman and not tolerate any crap from men?
First, know who you are and what you want. Have some self respect and others will follow. You should know the signs to look for, if you see any red flags when in a new relationshiip, or notice changes that you don't understand, call him on it. Some guys flirt with anyone. Be the better person, if some ****** comes up to you and you are in a committed relationship, tell him to buzz off. Some guys treat you better if you are a *****, I am not sure what that is about. There are no guarantees in life. No way to make sure that you won't get cheated on. If you do, dump his butt and find someone new.





If you truly love yourself, live by a good moral standard, have confidence and self esteem you will be treated with respect by others. Low self-esteem is a ticket to all kinds of unfavorable aspects in a relationship. Take care of you!
How to ensure a man won't cheat:


1- Fulfill all of his needs, emotional, and physical.


2- Or lock him in a room





Treating a man like crap will not make him respect you. That will just make him tell you what he thinks you want to hear. It will also make him much more impressed the next time he runs into a woman who is nice to him. Making it more likely he will cheat on you.





Finally, I don't think many guys flirt MORE after they are married, some flirted a lot before, and continue to flirt a lot afterwards. I can't think of any who flirt more after getting married though. However speaking about myself, I do talk a lot more to women now then I used to before getting married. I was the guy you see in the movies who stutters, forgets his name, and then spills something on himself whenever an attractive women approaches. Once I got married, I talk to women more often, I guess I am not intimidated because I don't feel like I need them to like me. But I wouldn't consider that flirting. Although my wife did notice the change and believe it or not wasn't happy about it.





-Just my two cents.






Well, first examine yourself. Are you basically a liberal? Do you seem to tolerate or go along with a lot of things that would be considered on the liberal side of life? Do you excuse a lot of people or say that one must be tolerant? If so, then you attract those who think you will just as happily and easily tolerate and condone or side with them being however they are.





I find that many people will be as tolerant as can be and will demand that others be just as tolerant of others. But then these same people will not like when things are done to them.





Basically, if you want others to have standards and be rather moral in their treatment of you, you must make sure that you live so as to attract these type of people. You must give them reason to be with you.





Offer the same things you want from another. Display toward others, just what you expect from them. Do not ask or expect what you will not or do not give to them.
I realize I'm speaking on [enemy..]soil here ; ) .... but if you treat me as a double-agent of sorts you may see what lies herein may be of some practical use...or maybe not...





1) this is key here...that last phrase..[maybe...not..]; wether male, female, significant-other, fiancee', brother, or son.... males, as well females...[if honest, right??]... want and respect people who give them freedom...with me so far...ladies???





2) I tend to have been raised as a passive-conservative-protestant-male in a rural-conservative-bible-preachin' church...I don't reveal this to many, but you ladies seem to be able to keep a secret or two, yes?? : ) ..





3) Anywho, those of us that do respect this freedom... ultimately test the degree or limitations of that freedom...sometimes consistently and persistently day in and day out...but ultimately those of us guy's with a similar background pushing there late 20's or early 30's... haven't yet to see what the [other-side..] has for them...that is the old 'Sewing their wild-oats exercise..' you know what I mean..??





4) Those of us that haven't[and I'm not speaking for myself necessarily..you be the judge..] if were intelectually %26amp; psychologically honest with ourselves will always be guessing what a 'Player' really is...and if its all cracked up to be how the 'Commedians' and 'Hollywood' portrays them to be.... let alone the some good and some not-so good self-help books... [attn: ladies... Secret#1... drop hints for your man to read: 'Nice Guy's and Players' ..] : the book listed here in the brackets...is a good foundational dynamic of the passive-week male vs the aggressive-player male.... and the author's suggestion of combining/synthesizing the best of both of these world's he calls the Real-Man... many author's imitate this book...but none come to mind that actually suceed in doing so... I'll leave a link below to Amazon for your filtered-choice in doing so..





5) And that's ultimately, what I want to leave all you ladies with...mostly out of selfish-motive for the sake of my own freedom's and capacity to exercise it..but also for yours..somehow..interpret that how you will...Happy Holiday's ladies...and may all your relationships grow truer, yet free-willingly so...first for yourself...and then to those.. of us...who you so choose to allow to be part of your lives...





~ Best Wishes ~





-sophiaseeker....
Lots of questions huh? Anyway, the only way you can hope he won't cheat is to have the kind of relationship that keeps him content. Treating a man like crap is not going to earn his respect. At least not a normal man. Some guys are just outgoing. I myself am one of them. What might appear to be flirting is to me just being friendly. I can be that way with others because I'm quite happy at home. Hope this helps some. Good luck.
You can't ensure a man won't cheat. You CAN pick a mate that is loyal, caring, trustworthy, and has a history of being good in monogamous relationships. You don't HAVE to choose a guy who will flirt with other women...or one that will give you crap.





Focus on changing and understanding yourself. Then you can find an equal mate, chosen with your eyes wide open.
You're just picking the wrong kind of guys to be with. Focus more on their personality and how strong their morals and faith are. A good man with morals won't treat you that way. Treating someone like crap is just playing a game and isn't any good for building a relationship. If you feel you have to do that, you're with the wrong person. Always respect yourself and men will respect you more!
Be there for him sexually. Some women just shut down and that gets frustrating. Our sex drive is usually way higher, so keep it satisfied or he will eventually search for satisfaction.





my opinion
Don't ever date or marry. You will never be happy with this kind of attitude. Not all men are like that and I am insulted to be lumped into your screwed up view of men.
TRUST is the only thing that makes this world survive


dont even think to break it


if you are true to him then he will definetly be true to you


theres no other way out



You are hooking up with the wrong men in the wrong places....
yes I think you are attracted to womanizers



your just picking the wrong men
you cant ensure anything but life and death! the rest is what u make it
you cant ensure anything but life and death! the rest is what u make it

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